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Proceeds T Shirt Category: Fashion/T-Shirts

Product: Proceeds T Shirt

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Description: Hey, check me out! I donated one whole dollar to cancer research and now I have this yellow bracelet so that the whole world can appreciate me! Do you know what would happen if every American donated just one dollar to help fight cancer? Not much, actually! In fact, that wouldn't even be a drop in the bucket. But I'll bet everyone would sure feel good about themselves! Everyone who's not dying of cancer, anyway. But I don't want to make a big thing about it. It's really about doing the right thing -- not about calling attention to yourself. Like, I hate when people give me props for this red t-shirt I'm wearing, for which 2% of my purchase goes to fight famine in Africa or something. Bono seems to think I'm a hero for buying it. I don't know if I'd go that far. I'm just a person who sees injustice in the world and does everything that $16.99 can to stop it. It's funny, too, because technically I didn't actually "buy" this red t-shirt. My friend Chad gave it to me. But I'm pretty sure the Africans still appreciate the gesture.



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Baboons Typing T Shirt Category: Fashion/T-Shirts

Product: Baboons Typing T Shirt

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Description: Dan Brown's highly anticipated new novel hit a snag on Tuesday when the "Da Vinci Code" author realized that the 50 monkeys he purchased to write the novel were, in fact, vicious baboons. According to one of Brown's human assistants, the author realized the error within seconds of opening the first crate. "You can pretty much tell the difference right away," said the assistant. "The monkeys that Dan normally uses – like the ones who wrote 'Da Vinci Code' – are placid, even friendly. But right away this thing tried to rip his face off. And once he saw the shackles – well – that's when things really got ugly." Fortunately Brown was able to subdue the crazed primate with a tranquilizer dart and suffered only minor injuries. A corrected shipment of monkeys is being rushed to Brown's basement, where they will be chained to typewriters and fed a diet of leaves, insects and psychological abuse until they collectively produce a best-selling novel.





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