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Stalin: I Voted T Shirt Category: Fashion/T-Shirts

Product: Stalin: I Voted T Shirt

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Description: Under criticism for reverting to a more authoritarian form of government -- evidenced by disputed elections and media crackdowns -- Russia's ruling party has begun a marketing blitz to promote the image of a free and fair democracy. But the results have been spotty. One notable failure has been a "hip" line of t-shirts showing Soviet dictators like Josef Stalin and Vladimir Lenin wearing "I Voted" pins. There is also a Stalinized version of the "Vote or Die!" t-shirt, which reads, "Vote or Die, or Be Assigned to a Gulag Labor Camp." And, courting the youth vote, officials unveiled their version of the "Vote for Pedro" t-shirt from Napoleon Dynamite, which reads "Vote for Pedro... if, by 'Pedro,' you Mean Pro-Kremlin United Russia." Despite lackluster tee sales, the government stands by its campaign. "If you don't vote, you can't complain," said Dmitry Maslov, a Kremlin spokesperson. "But seriously, even if you do vote, it's probably not a good idea to complain. Just saying."



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Sewer Gator T Shirt Category: Fashion/T-Shirts

Product: Sewer Gator T Shirt

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Description: A rash of alligator attacks in New York City has prompted officials to declare an all-out emergency. Yesterday, Mayor Bloomberg announced the appointment of the city's first "Gator Czar." Long thought to be merely an urban legend, New York's "sewer gators" were proven all too real last May when a 10-footer jumped out of a manhole near the corner of West 34th and Broadway and devoured a cockerpoo in broad daylight. Since then, New York's gator population has exploded, which experts believe is due to the reptiles developing a taste for rats, small pets, and overpriced fashion. A New York resident is now twice as likely to be attacked by an alligator as he or she is to get pooped on by a pigeon. Biologically, the New York gators are similar to regular alligators, except they're ruder and tend to think of themselves as the center of the universe.





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